I'm Engaged!

Things about the wedding plans so far:

Dave and I are getting married 2011, possibly beginning of July or end of August, or in September. We have to work around a few high school graduations, my mother's trip to Colorado, and Harvest season. Dave's entire family farms, so for us to have the wedding in August or September may not be ideal.

I'm thinking July 2nd or 9th.

The wedding will be held in Bruxelles, Manitoba, the place Dave grew up in. I thought I wanted an outside wedding, but there are too many variables. We've decided on having a secular, non-denominational wedding at the Bruxelles church. Some sort of justice of the peace or whoever will marry us. No hymms. No prayers. No priests, pastors, popes, buddahs, rabbis, Allahs or the like. Jesus nailed to a cross will be present because he is also nailed to the wall.

The reception will take place at the Bruxelles community hall. Since there's really nothing to do in Bruxelles, and no where to go, I hope that the hall can be decorated and set up the night before so that people can go straight there to hang out. I'll have cards, dice, and crib boards set out so that people can play games while they wait. There's going to be a lot of children at the wedding and they'll need to be kept occupied, so hopefully that will help while the wedding party gets their pictures taken.

I have so many thoughts and ideas about how I want to decorate, (candles everywhere!) colour schemes, (lots of green!) food and drink to serve, (Sutter Home White Zinfandel!)

We're doing our own music for the wedding. 3/4 of what DJ's play is crap and Dave and I both hate it. We've got over a year to download all the songs we want, so it won't be that hard to fill up a portable hard drive and plug it into a laptop at the reception.

Once Dave gets the website up and running, I want a section where people can request songs to play at our wedding. There will a banned songs list.

Anything by Shania Twain is banned. 7/8 of all country songs are banned. Most music from the 80's is banned. Absolutely NO gimmicky crap social songs ie, chicken dance, macarena, grease lightening, cotten eyed joe... you get the idea.

Dave's family are Beatles fans, so lots of that will be played. My family likes to polka. Dave's taking me out for couples dancing lessons. We're going to have to show off our move at our wedding! Some tango?

Anyway, I'm totally stoked! I can't stop thinking about the wedding!

Success!

Everyone wore black. Even Grandma and she never wore black. The whole family was there. Old friends. Coworkers. Jeremiah Vaughn clasped his grandma’s hand and glanced around the semi-circle that formed around his mother’s casket outside. Everyone thought it was a mistake, a bad joke. Catherine Vaughn was too young to die. She was only 45. Jeremiah turned his gaze to his fancy shoes. His mother had bought him these shoes to wear to his high school graduation five years ago. He flunked out, but she still had faith in him that one day he’d graduate.

Jeremiah could clearly hear the priest, but he was not listening to a word he said. He was focussed inward. Focussed on his pain, his guilt, and his overwhelming desire to climb inside the casket and hold his mother one last time before the dirt and worms covered the mahogany finish he and Grandma had picked out together. He longed for his mother in such a terrible way he squeezed Grandma’s frail hand so hard she yelped.

But the priest didn’t miss a beat. “...we therefore commit her body to the ground. Earth to earth. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. In sure and certain hope of resurrection to eternal life, through our Lord Jesus Christ..."

Tears welled up in his eyes, but Jeremiah refused to let them fall. He could feel everyone’s eyes on his back, judging him. Everyone knew the details of how and why it happened. His mother was an angel, sent from heaven to rescue him and he killed her and sent her back.

He remembers lying in a pool of his own vomit on his bedroom floor. Cobwebs connected empty bottles on his dresser. Pennies and little pieces of lint and bits of paper were stuck in the dirty Carpet. Catherine had gone in to attempt to vacuum, but he forcefully threw her out. She was becoming afraid of him. He was tall, like his father. He had the same broad shoulders and deep set eyes. They had the same taste in cars, movies, and beer.

But his father didn’t kill her.

Even when the service ended, Jeremiah stayed. It was imperative for Jeremiah that he watch every last granule of dirt cover his mother’s final resting place. It was of the utmost importance that he arranged the flowers and wreath perfectly and then say just one final prayer before going home to a house filled with mourners. Grandma ordered a catering service to come supply dainties and egg salad sandwiches for the reception in their living room.

“It’s what my daughter would have wanted,” she said.

It was like a dream for Jeremiah. He floated from the grave back to his house. There were pictures of his mother everywhere he looked. People kept coming in and out of the house, dropping off casseroles and sympathy cards. He kept hearing her name over and over again; it was driving him mad. He drank red wine to block the sounds, but then thought of his mother’s blood, cold and still, never to flush her face again. It could have been him. He ate a brownie topped with chopped walnuts and thought of the maggots that would magically appear in the coffin and eat his mother’s face until all that was left were empty eye sockets.

Jeremiah ran upstairs to the bathroom and threw up. It should have been him.

Just a few days ago he was so mad at her. How dare she tell him what to do! How dare she compare him to his dead-beat father!

“I’m young! This is what young people do!” he yelled.

Catherine stayed calm and collected. “Young people graduate from high school and get into a good university and make something of themselves. I’ve had enough of this life. I spent two decades with a man just like you and if you think I’m going to spend even one more day living like this, you are wrong!”

“I’m not going to no fucking rehab place!” Jeremiah spat defiantly. “What are you gonna do? Call the cops on me? We don’t even have a phone!”

“We don’t have a phone because you stole the money out of my purse that I was going to use to pay the phone bill and you bought beer. You are not having anymore tonight. You’re killing yourself. You need help!” Catherine brushed past her son and grabbed the rest of the case of beer from his room.

“Those are mine! You can’t do that!”

Catherine started cracking open cans of beer and emptying them in the sink.

“I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!” he screamed. “I paid for those! Those are mine!”

He lunged at her, but his depth perception was off and he missed.

“Fine,” he said defeated. “If I can’t drink here I’ll go somewhere else.” He grabbed her keys and went outside, still covered in puke, not wearing any shoes.

“You’re not driving, Jeremiah. What if you killed someone?” Catherine wrestled him for the keys. “I’ll drive you,” she said lowering her eyes.

They got in the truck and Catherine slowly reversed out of the driveway and headed toward downtown. She didn’t ask Jeremiah which bar he wanted to go to. She knew his favourite place. As they passed right by it, Jeremiah started to get upset again.

“Where are you taking me? Turn around! Let me drive!”

“It’s for your own good. Trust me. One day you’ll see,” she replied.

Jeremiah could see the cop shop up ahead, “You’re going to pay for this! I hope you rot in hell! You are the worst mother anyone has ever had.”

Catherine ignored him, “I love you, Jeremiah. I’m doing this because I love you.”

The yellow-light ahead turned red and Catherine prepared to slow down. Jeremiah undid his seatbelt and jumped out of the truck. Catherine slammed her vehicle in park, not bothering to move the truck out of the lane and raced after him. Jeremiah made it across the street. Catherine didn’t. She ran out into on-coming traffic and was struck by another vehicle. When paramedics arrived they announced her dead at the scene, Jeremiah was long gone.

Grandma came upstairs and saw Jeremiah sitting on the bathroom floor crying.

“She knows you loved her,” she said, stroking the top of his hair.

Jeremiah regained composure and wiped his eyes.

He got up off the floor and ran downstairs. He grabbed as many bottles of liquor as he could hold and went outside, still covered in puke, not wearing any shoes. He smashed each bottle on the driveway with conviction. Shards of glass went flying. He went back inside and took the wine right out of the mourners hands and threw it in the sink, glass and all. He found full cans of beer hidden in his room, in the back of closets and under couch cushions. Everyone stared. He cracked each can open and drowned his sorrows in a new way. His mother had rescued him after all.

SCI Creative Writing Module 3 Assignment B4523B

I need help, creatively. My latest assignment is to write a 1000-1500 word fictional story that either ends linearly, OR uses the flashback technique to fill in necessary details.

Let me explain.

Stories can end with a circular ending or they can end with a linear ending.

A circular ending is when the conclusion of the story comes full circle from the beginning of the story. The circular ending is a before/after or then/now contrast. The beginning and end are tied together with a turning point in the middle. It's like, that was the norm then, but this is the norm now. Some examples would be, The Wizard of Oz, A Christmas Carole, and Watership Down.

A linear ending is when your story keeps building and building and building until you reach the final conflict. Once the result is known the story immediately ends. You drive toward a single goal and stop when it has been achieved. This is typical of mystery, suspense, and adventure stories.

And as I copy from my text book: "If you tell of bygone events in narrative summary, it's exposition. If you dramatize them as a scene, it's a flashback.... The virtue of flashbacks is that, unlike exposition, they're showing, not telling."

Since I have no inclination to write a mystery, suspense, or adventure story, even though I like reading true crime stories and other suspense/thriller books, I know that when I do this assignment I will probably have to write a story that uses flashbacks and has a circular ending.

The problem is that everything I write ends up being way longer than 1500 words and I just came seem to think of something to write about that would require a flashback and also make sense to the rest of the story in a short time span.

If a story is so short that you only use 1 or two flashbacks, there's really no point in using the flashbacks technique at all. You may as well save yourself the trouble and write it as exposition instead. In my opinion, using flashbacks in a 1500 word story is utterly ridiculous.

And I can't really think of any good ideas to write about. I started one about a single mom that was in a car crash and I was going to flash back to when she was still alive to tell some of the story that lead up to the car crash, but it's just not working and the story is getting too long. I can't cut parts out of the story without totally redoing the whole thing, so I may as well just start a brand new story.

I'm totally frustrated with this assignment. Help! Creative ideas! I need them!

10 Years From Now

I seriously HATE it when people ask me, "Where do you see yourself in 10 years... five years... however many years I arbitrarily pull out of my ass?"

Maybe I'm just really terrible at setting goals for myself, but I can't see myself in ten years no matter how hard I try. I want the same thing everyone wants in ten years time.

I want to be in peak physical condition, married, living in my dream house with my fabulous husband and 2 well-behaved children. I want to have a career and I want to have been to Europe at least twice. Maybe even have written two more books.

I live paycheck to paycheck and I can't even think ahead a month from now because in those thirty days a trillion things can change, and they do change. Could you imagine the changes in TEN YEARS?

My career goal in ten years from now is literally to have a full-time job. That's my top priority right now. Forget big dreams and lofty career goals, I need a fucking job first! If you hire me now, I'll have that ten years from now question answered for you in about a year's time.

None of the "goals" I have for ten years from now are career related at all. I don't even know if I want to work in a news station for the rest of my life. I don't know if I even want to work in media in general for the rest of my life. How can there be such motivated people in the world that they know what they want career-wise in ten years time? How do you even plan that?

It's 1:30 in the morning and I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about this. Are there people out there who are in their early twenties and know where they want to be in life before they hit age 35? I'm getting stressed out about this.

Feeling Fabulous!

So I sent out my Christmas cards and I also sent out exactly 10 copies of my book. They're autographed, so I'll know who threw it away if I ever find one in a used book store ha ha.

I didn't think they'd arrive so fast, but only 2/10 haven't told me they received anything yet. Everyone's texting me an emailing me. I'm feeling pretty awesome and I'm really glad I decided to share my book with my friends. I was unsure at first if I wanted to put myself out there, but everyone's been very kind and very flattering. It makes me want to keep writing.

I can't stop smiling and dancing around! I have 28 copies left of my book just sitting in packaging. I don't know what to do with them right now. I'll probably just save them and distribute them as I see fit.

There were a number of type-o's due to my utter carelessness in editing. They're mostly all fixed now and a new version has been uploaded to LuLu.com

My next book, Keeping Secrets is still in the baby stages. I'm feeling really encouraged to go forth hard and strong with it! Thanks for reading.

Good Things

A wave of good news has occurred this week!

1. I received a call from CBC requesting an interview for the position I applied for like a month ago.

2. My 2nd cousin, Katryna Reimer is interested in family tree and wants to talk to me on the phone and share information with each other.

3. I received a 96% on my second writing submission for my creative writing course at Stratford.
The senior editor graded my paper and has requested that I send all further works to her personally to grade because she likes my writing and wants to continue reading it. I was nervous that my 2nd submission wouldn't do as well as my first submission, which received a 94% but now I feel really confident that my third submission is going to rock her world!

I don't really feel like writing right now since I've been writing all morning, but I felt obligated to update this blog.

Versatility in Foods

Certain foods are extremely versatile in the way that you can make them different every time you make them. Using the same basic ingredients, you can create a multitude of flavourful variations!

A basic cookie recipe is pretty standard across the board. You can add oatmeal or peanut-butter to mix it up a bit, but it doesn't stop there; You can add chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, smarties, various nuts, raisins, other dried fruit, candy bar pieces, coconut; if it's in your pantry you can put it in your cookie! Once you've found a good base, it doesn't matter what you add to it, it's only going to make it taste better!

Same thing goes for muffins. Literally any fruit you have in the house, especially if it's getting too ripe, can be put in a muffin. Any sort of chocolate, or nut or dried fruit can be mixed in! Just got to have to good base.

Smoothies are another one of my favourite things to make simply because you don't need a lot to make them. Fruit, milk/juice, yogurt blend done. How simple is that? The only thing you have to be conscious of is if your smoothie is citrus based or not. Oranges and milk don't go good together. And if you don't have yogurt, you can use tofu, and I always add flax to my smoothies! I've never made a bad flavoured smoothie before.

Finally, salads. Seriously, salads are awesome. You can put so much awesome stuff in a salad. Start with a base of mixed greens, add any chopped vegetable you like. I like to add berries and apples to my salad. Throw in some croutons, pumpkin seeds, nuts, or dried fruit, add whatever flavour dressing you desire and away you go. Done. How easy was that? Some people put some egg or chicken or ham in their salads. Personally, that's not my cup of tea, but hey, that's why salads are versatile!

The list really goes on.
Soups.
Sandwiches.
Pizza.
Pasta dishes.

Once you get really good at it, you start to come up with crazy recipes all from your imagination. I invent a lot of my own recipes. I've combined chicken with peanut-butter, chicken with raspberries, pineapple with rice and cheddar... I accidentally sprinkled cinnamon on my ground beef once and that turned out pretty good too!

You get this sixth sense for flavours and you start craving weird things. I do anyway. When I get knocked up, I'm going to be the most insane chef in the kitchen!

But then there are some foods that you like to eat prepared the same way every time and you avoid improvising ingredients at all costs. For me, that would be stir-frys. I use the same sauce and the same vegetables with rice in my stir-fry every single time I make it and if I don't have all the ingredients I want, I will not make it or even substitute for a similar ingredient. It's just not the same.

I super love food right now.

Things I Could Be Doing

I could be
- exercising at the gym
- exercising at home
- reading my book for my Creative Writing course
- writing a story for my Creative Writing course
- reading the book Carly lent me MONTHS ago that I still haven't picked up
- washing dishes
- doing laundry
- sweeping

Instead I'm doing nothing. Literally. Sitting. Watching TV. Playing the same boring computer games. I switched it up a little today and played some X-Box

I'll probably watch the season finale of Jon and Kate Plus 8 in half an hour.

Dave made me dinner. I might eat that in a bit too.

I seriously need to do something different with my life.

Today David went to work. He came home and made dinner then went to band practice. He actually told me to start thinking about doing some other activities besides TV and computer. Coming from David... I think I have a problem.

Sad Face

It's official. I am depressed. I am destined to live a life of poverty and isolation because I cannot afford to go out with my friends because I have no job.

I'm not going to get an interview at CBC. I don't know that for sure, but I handed in my application nearly two weeks ago and haven't heard a single thing. I tried snooping around the office, asking coworkers if they knew who else applied and that sort of thing.

Actually a funny thing happened yesterday. A guy from Global came up to me and asked where I've been because he hasn't seen me around the city. Then he asked about the position at CBC and if I'm a candidate. I told him I applied, but understood that there were others above me who I thought had a better chance at getting it than I did. He shrugged and said, you never know!

It's true. You do never know. CBC is pretty slow moving. It's possible that they haven't even gotten through all the applications yet, or there's other pressing things that need to get done first. I don't know. I don't want to give myself false hope.

I've definitely started to give up hope.

Seasons Greetings everyone. Enjoy your holiday envelops I'll be sending filled with cheer, good wishes, and air.

Mini-Melt Down

I had a mini-melt down today while working for Advanis.
I had talked to numerous assholes throughout my shift and the last straw was when I called a man and asked to speak to whoever and he told me he was in the bathroom taking a shit. I understood right away that he was trying to be jerk but it's my job to ask for a call back time so I asked if there was a better time to call back. He said, "'yeah after you finish wiping his ass!" I didn't know what to say, so I said, very funny sir and ended the call. Then I burst into tears and cried for five minutes.

I wish I could have told him to fuck off and die, but I could potentially lose my job if I said that. Unfortunately I still need the income I get from Advanis to pay the bills.

I know I shouldn't let these fuckers get to me, but it really wears you down. You start to feel annoyed and then bad about yourself because everyone's rude to you and you can't even defend yourself.

Sometimes I just laugh it off. Everyone's so serious all the time; it's funny that they let something so trivial like a market researcher calling them bother them to the point where their blood pressure rises. Other times, like today, it becomes too much, especially when I started my shift in a bad mood.

I had to repeat out loud over and over again: Don't take it personally. They hate your job, they don't hate you, like a mantra to make myself feel better.

I can't wait to quit this stupid job.

American Assholes

Int> Hello. My name is Chelsea, I’m calling from Advanis, a Market Research company. May I speak with MELVIN?

Resp> (Wife) Just a minute... (to husband: I don't know who it is or what they want.)
Resp> (Respondent) You're calling on a Saturday, this better be good.

Int> Hello, MELVIN. We’d like to invite you to complete an online survey about tractors. For completing the online survey you will receive $20 cash. May I ask you a few questions now to see if you qualify for the online survey?

Resp> (yelling) Now how the hell did you get this number? We are on the do not call list! (crazed yelling about telemarketers)

Int> (interrupting) Actually, we're not trying to sell you anything, so that list doesn't apply to us. Market research companies don't have to follow the same laws that telemarketers do.

Resp> Well, to me they're the same thing!

Int> According to the law we're not.

Resp> (more crazed yelling and some semblance of a goodbye. Respondent doesn't hang up the phone properly.)
Resp> (wife) What did she want?
Resp> (still audibly upset) I don't know who it was was or what they hell she wanted (muttering)

End Call.

Maybe if you weren't fucking SCREAMING AT ME ASSHOLE and LISTENED you'd know what the hell is going on! This guy seriously brought tears to my eyes. Yes, I'm calling you on a Saturday, but yelling at me only makes you look like an uneducated hick (which I'm sure you probably are anyhow.)

When someone calls you either from a telemarketing company OR a market research company and you don't want to talk to us:
DON'T
-yell
-say the respondent's not there
-hang up the phone

Because we HAVE to call you back if we don't speak with the person we're looking for and we're going to CONTINUE calling you back and until we get what what we want, or else you tell us never to call again or to take your number off our list.

Maybe try being polite. Say nicely that you're not interested and to take your number off our list.

I'm just doing my fucking job and it's already shitty so you don't have to make it even worse for me.

Debt

I am obsessed with debt and money management and budgeting right now.

Since my earlier post when I was complaining that I spend money on unnecessary items willy-nilly, I've really turned my life around. I looked back at my bank statements for the past 6 months and calculated my average income. It varies month to month, but I average about $2000 a month.

I created a new Microsoft Excel spreadsheet and started listing all of my expenses I have to pay each month. I started with my fixed expenses, like rent and minimum debt payments. Then I started listing all my variable necessary expenses, ie: groceries, utilities, car, laundry...

Then I went online and found this pie chart (took me like 5 searches to find it) that showed what percentage of your income you should be spending on each category. Take a look:



After studying this pie chart, I took my average income, did the math to figure out what each percentage was in dollar amounts and started plugging in some numbers into my Excel spreadsheet.

My personal pie chart looks a little different than this one does. Since I only use about 8% of my income on transportation, the left over 7% went over to the debt category. My "Housing" and "Other Living Expenses" were also a lower percentage so I took the extra and moved it over to savings and to debt.

I now spend 24% of my income on paying off debt and save 15% of my income in a savings account.

Everything is budgeted perfectly and I even have a few hundred dollars to spend on entertainment and dining-out each month.

I called to check to see how much was left owing on my Canada Student Loan: $2696.53
On November 28, 2008, I owed $6547.24
Holy shit right? I'm doing good! They're giving me like 4 yeras to pay this off. I'll have it paid off way before then!!!

Plus I have the thousand some odd dollars left to pay on my credit card. If I keep up with my budget, I should be debt free in 16 months on less. Any extra income I make goes straight to my debt.

And then I shall be free! Oh what a glorious day it will be!
But once the debt is paid off, that means the money I've been putting to debt will now be put to saving for a down payment for a house. The debt cycle never ends.

Job

I received an interesting phone call yesterday and I'm still trying to decipher exactly what it means. A job opening for a camera operator became available at CBC in Winnipeg. Since we're doing that new late night 15 minute news thing we need an extra camera.

I wasn't going to apply at first. They want you to have at least 3 years experience and blah blah blah. Then I received an email yesterday from the boss of my boss telling me and one other casual employee that out of respect to CBC's casual employees, there is a job offer that we are eligible to apply for.

I'm thinking to myself, okay well I should at least apply for the job. I know I probably won't get it since the other casual employee has way more experience and has been with CBC way longer than I have, but applying makes me look like I'm interested in continuing to be employed with CBC (which I am!)

So I started filling out the application online. I spruced up my resume. Then I wrote a killer cover letter. This cover letter was honestly the best cover letter I have ever written!!!

Writing a cover letter for a position that you're applying for internally is awesome! There's so many great examples that you can use to prove how skillful and wonderful of an employee you are. I really focused on my soft skills, you know, the interpersonal stuff and saved my technical skill for last in the cover letter.

As I was doing all this I received a phone call from my boss's boss, (the same person who emailed me.) She asked if I was going to apply for the job and I said that I right in the middle of doing so. She said "good" and we ended our phone conversation.

I submitted my application. But then I got to thinking... why would she personally call me at home after already emailing me about it to confirm that I was applying for the job? Do I honestly have a shot at scoring an interview? I had applied for the exact same job except nearly a year ago and I didn't even get an interview because she said I wasn't experience enough.

Now I'm getting calls at home making sure from the head boss herself that I'm applying!

I fully understand that I am at the very bottom of the CBC technical food chain. There are many people above me who work casually that I think would be hired before me. On the flip side, I think I'm the only casual employee who does not do freelance work on the side.

Freelance is where the money is at apparently.

I don't know anything about renting gear and I don't have any contacts. I don't think my camera skills are good enough to do corporate stuff and I never want to shoot a wedding. That would be hell. I'm good at doing news. News is very forgiving of any mistakes I might make.

If I get a full time job at CBC I will be very surprised and also very happy! This could be my ticket.

Characters & Viewpoint

I'm currently reading a book called Characters & Viewpoint by Orson Scott Card.

It's part of my Creative Writing course I'm taking from Stratford Career Institute.

The book is very interesting and I found it to be very useful for my purposes. I feel good about myself when I read things that I already knew about fiction writing. I feel really inspired when I learn more about fiction writing that I wasn't fully aware of.

I didn't crack open this book and go, oh wow I never knew so much about writing. It's more like, I started reading and realized, oh that's how you use that technique properly!

It makes me want to practice writing in different styles than what I'm used to just because now I know how to do it properly.

But I constantly feel like, what should I write about? I'll think of a million things, and none of them really feel good enough. Some of them don't feel like they could be developed into something usable so I discard them.

That sounds dumb because I am the writer. I am playing God with my stories. I have complete control over everything that happens, done to every last detail. Nothing is left to chance. If I don't like where a story is headed I can introduce a new element, or I can change everything completely.

As a writer though, I find that I like to envision something from start to finish. I know how it starts and I know how it ends. It's just filling the middle. I find it hard to do that. How do I logically get from point A to point B while still maintaining my readers' interest and curiosity?

I have much to learn still.

Or maybe I'm trying to think too large-scale in terms of what I'm ready to write.

I don't know. I'll just keep trying I guess.

Freezer Meals

I was going to try my hand at making two week's worth of Freezer Meals. So far I've marinated a bunch of chicken and thrown it into the freezer. Not exactly a good start, but better than nothing.

The point of Freezer Meals is to make ahead as many complete and cooked meals as you like and then just freeze them into individual portions. When you wake up in the morning, just pull a meal out of the freezer and put it in the fridge to thaw out. When you come from work, you pop the meal into the microwave or oven to reheat and away you go. Nutritious meal made fast!

It's an awesome way to have a healthy meal every day, but without the time constraints. You can freeze almost anything too: rice, mashed potatoes, pasta, vegetables... the only things that aren't recommended for freezing would be cream sauces that contain milk and similar dairy type things like that.

There are people who literally freeze a month's worth of meals at a time. It's a lot of work and takes a lot of preparation, but apparently it can be done! There are websites dedicated to this practice. I couldn't believe it when I read it.

I can see the benefits though. A normal family, 2 parents with careers and 2 or 3 kids each involved in extra-curricular activities, doesn't leave much time to make a good dinner. Life is rushed, things need to get done, so why waste 2 hours on preparing, cooking, and eating a meal?

All it takes is one weekend a month. Friday you decide what meals you want to freeze. Saturday you shop for the ingredients. Sunday you cook and freeze. There's obviously a lot more that goes into it than that, but you get the idea. I've been reading lots about it and I've picked up on many neat tricks and hints for getting the most out of your freezer meals. It's just a matter of actually making the meals!

My kitchen is fucking TINY! There's barely any counter space at all and it makes it really hard to do anything in there, even when it's completely clean and everything's put away. It's frustrating.

Barbies

I played with barbies when I was in 7th grade primarily because I had a little sister, 3 years younger than I, and she still liked barbies, but also because I still kind of liked barbies. I found this article on MSN today and it's about how Barbie is really struggling to keep her title as number one doll in the world.

Mattel pins hopes on Barbie's makeover

It got me thinking about toys for children and how tastes change through the generations. When it comes to tweens (ages 10-12), girls don't want to play with barbies like they did when I was a tween. They want iPods, cell phones, laptops, video games. The "Barbie phase" is shorter lived in comparison to when I was a tween.

When I was a tween, I played with barbies, I rode my bike everywhere, and I would rock out to Backstreet Boys in my room with my friends.

Yes I tried to dress inappropriately (ie too sexy) for my age. Yes I was obsessed with clothes and lipgloss and looking cool. Yes I practiced dance moves in front of my mirror. Some things never change. Girls will always be this way.

But somehow it feels different.
Music: Will my 10 year old have an iPod (or whatever it is that exists when my child is 10)
When I was 10 I had a walkman. When discman's came out, my mom bought me one of those for Christmas. The iPod is the next generation logically speaking. So, why do I feel like a 10 year old with an iPod is crazy? Is it because it's more expensive than a discman?

Laptop: Will my 10 year old have her own laptop? That's so hard to decide because who knows how the school system will change by the time I have a 10 year old? Maybe that's how all homework will be completed. The reason why I didn't have a laptop when I was 10 was because it didn't really exist. So, why do I feel like a 10 year old with her own laptop is excessive? What's wrong with sharing a PC between family members like I did growing up?

Communication: Will my 10 year old have a Blackberry or other similar device? The way things are going, everyone is going to have a smart phone eventually. The thought of even a 13 year old with a normal cell phone is disturbing to me. I didn't get my first cell phone until I was 16!

Video Games: They've been around forever it seems. Personally, I wasn't allowed to have them growing up, but I know my children will grow up with video games. They just will. They make video games for toddlers straight through to adults.

I keep seeing this commercial for a video game for toddlers. You hook up this plastic stationary bike to the TV and the kid can learn about letters and numbers through games all while peddling on this bike. It's so stupid. Why don't you buy your kid a fucking tricycle and let your child get some fresh air outside.

I can see how this stupid plastic bike video game is tempting to parents. Their child gets to learn while exercising indoors, keeping safe, not breaking anything in the house as well as keeping quiet and occupied. But where's the adventure? Where's the exploration? Where's the cuts and scrapes and mud puddles that go along with playing outside?

It makes me sad. That's the world my child will grow up in. There will be little to no make-believe games. No creativity or imagination required at play time. Everything my child plays with will be a video game of some sorts (encouraging learning of course) or a gadget or something with batteries or that needs to be charged or plugged in.

Barbie will eventually morph into some sort of walking and talking robot (that encourages learning of course.)

Addiction

Hi, my name's Chelsea and I'm addicted to shopping.

(chorus: Hi Chelsea.)

I seriously think I might have a problem. I spend money I don't have. I buy things that are not essential to living. I'm constantly in debt because I live off my credit card and max it out every month. When I try to pay it off, I can only pay off some of it, but then I have no more money, so I have to live off my credit card until my next payday. It's terrible!

Even though I'm living beyond my means, it's not like I'm buying frivolous crap or squandering my money and having nothing to show for it. I'm usually buying things for the apartment and kitchen, upgrades of sorts.

The reasons why I'm buying this stuff is because:

• it's on sale and the price is too good to pass up
  
• it's something I think will make my life better or easier
• I really like it and I want it

This past week I've bought:

1. my Halloween costume from Value Village $30
2. a mini trampoline from Walmart for exercising in the apartment $40
3. groceries (for 2 ppl) $150
4. cat food and litter (for 3 cats) $80
5. 1 pair of Lucky Brand Jeans $100
6. but I had to buy the jeans to save 30% on this awesome sweater that I've been in love with for months and absolutely just had to have before they ran out of stock (which they did once but thankfully they ordered more!) $100
7. some glass tupperware type containers from Sears that you can freeze and also put in the oven (up to 400 degress F) plus they're dishwasher and microwave safe and they were on for 10% off $98

My spending just escalates! I don't know how I do it sometimes! It's really bad because I'm not working very much at all. I can barely pay my bills and here I am buying all this stuff, which, while most of it good stuff and it's nice to have, I know my life will still go on without it and that I can make do without it.

Buying things makes me feel good, especially when I'm buying something that is on sale and a great deal. My heart pumps a little bit faster. I feel really happy as the transaction is going through and I know that in mere seconds, the product will be considered mine and I can take it home and do as I wish with it.

Probably 3 minutes after I've claimed ownership over something the guilt and shame sets in. I think, omg what have I done? What did I just buy? Why did I buy this? Did I really need this?

There's still time to turn around and return it, but I throw my bag in the trunk of my car and drive home.

What I should really do is lower my credit limit and lock my Visa up in the safe where it's harder to get at. I use my Visa for everything and that is not a healthy habit right now since I'm unable to pay off that outstanding balance.

Maybe if I worked regular hours like normal people it wouldn't be so bad. I admit, I'm often bored at home so I go to the mall "just to look" and end up spotting some great deals and buying everything I can. I just have to tell myself to fuck off and put down the Visa before I bankrupt myself and can't pay my rent.

It's sad because I know that a lot of people out there live the way I do. Maybe they don't think it's an issue, but for me it's a problem that's only going to get worse as Christmas approaches.

A Baby Story

Dave and I got two free months of cable from Shaw. They're constantly calling us to ask if we want to bundle shit together and we keep telling 'em NO!!!

But when they asked if we wanted to try two months of basic digital cable for free PLUS get $10 off our internet bill for two months, we said we would as long as we could cancel our cable after the two free months was up.

Since getting cable, all I watch is TLC and Slice. Those are the two best channels in the world.

There is one show in particular that I've been watching, even though I hate it, and it's called A Baby Story. Perhaps you've heard of it? CLICK HERE to watch an episode if you like. Scroll ahead to about a 1:40 in if you want to cut to the good stuff.

Every episode I watch I am in tears! This mom didn't scream as much as some others do. If you go to TLC's website you can watch all sorts of birth videos!

I just can't handle watching it sometimes and I think about if I ever gave birth how I'd probably want to die. I'd be on so much drugs I wouldn't want to feel any pain. Ugh I feel sick thinking about giving birth.

And then afterward the nurses just hand the mom this bloody mess of a baby covered in all this gook and fluids and it's so disgusting and the mother's crying and I'm crying on the couch, and it's over and we're all so glad that it's over.

The getting pregnant part doesn't seem so bad of course, and then being pregnant seems to be okay... it's the giving birth part that leaves a lot to be desired.

A lot of it is ignorance on my behalf. I don't really know how child birth works. I've never had a conversation with a pregnant woman about how her pregnancy is going. Each woman is different and each pregnancy is different. There are so many complications that can occur and it's like the more I learn about it, the less I want to go through with it.

Then comes the part of the show where you see the new baby adapting to life at home. The baby is clean and cute and sleeping. The mom looks fabulous and is holding her precious jewel wrapped up in soft cuddly blankets. That's when I change my mind and am like, well maybe I want to get pregnant still. It seems like it would be worthwhile in the end.

Surprise Toast

I was reading some articles about how to incorporate more fruit into your diet and which fruits and vegetables were in season for October. Most of it I already know, and practice doing.

Things like, buying a variety of fresh, frozen, dried, and canned fruits, so no matter what you'll always have some on hand. I keep canned pineapple, mandarins, and peaches in the house at all times. They're great for making cobblers and other baking. I keep bags and bags of frozen fruit in the freezer. I make smoothies out of them, and I also bake muffins and cobblers with them. I always have raisins in the house. They're great to put in my porridge. I keep other dried fruits in the house like cranberries, cherries, and blueberries to make homemade granola bars with.

Fresh fruit and vegetables I have such a hard time eating though. It's not that I don't like eating them, because I really do, it's just like I always forget I have fresh fruit and vegetables in the house. They go bad. I throw them out. I buy some more and repeat the cycle.

I like eating cold fruit, so my fruit is usually hidden away in the crisper where I can't see it when I open the fridge. Room temperature apples and oranges are the very worst to eat! It's not refreshing at all!

I love biting into the flesh of a cold orange, and having the juice run all over my hands and face. I like to imagine I'm a savage and the orange is my warthog that I have just slain. Using my teeth and sucking the fruit off the peel is like ripping the warthog's bloody meat off the bone. It makes the orange taste so much more delicious!

Anyway, while reading the articles I was very randomly reminded of 'Surprise Toast.'

I can't remember how old I was, probably between the ages of 7-9 and my sister would have been between the ages of 4-6. One day I woke up and my parents were still sleeping, so I decided to make breakfast by myself for my sister and I. I wanted it to be a special and interesting breakfast, so I invented Surprise Toast.

It's toast with a smiley face decorated on it with various food items that I could find in the house that didn't require a sharp knife to cut up.

I'd toast the bread and spread it with peanut butter, or jam, or both. I usually used cake sprinkles for the hair, raisins or chocolate chips for the mouth, a marshmallow nose, and bananas for the eyes (since I could use a butter knife to cut up the banana.)

My sister thought this was THE BEST fucking breakfast in the entire universe! When she saw it her face lit up and and she was the happiest little girl in town.

From then on, she'd always ask me to make it for her. I was a pretty creative little kid and I would often try to change things up. Whatever I could find in the house to use to create the face I would, whether it be nuts for the mouth, cereal hair, grapes or berries for eyes, smarties for the nose. I would just find stuff to make a face on her toast.

It was always awesome and my sister always ate it and thanked me for breakfast. The reason why it was called Surprise Toast was because my sister never knew what ingredients I'd use to make the face on the toast.

I've been laughing about it for like twenty minutes now and I can't stop thinking about it. The thought of me as a little kid in my pajamas, making this infamous Surprise Toast unsupervised in the kitchen is a riot because I'd spill stuff, and leave all my ingredients sitting out on the counter for mom to find and clean when she woke up.

My sister and I liked to play restaurant and we would wake up early in the morning and draw up menus and give them to mom while she was still in bed so she could order what she wanted to have for breakfast. Her options were usually cereal, Surprise Toast, and then something impossible for a child to make by herself like french toast or pancakes. Secretly we always hoped she'd order Surprise Toast and we'd often try to up-sell it at her bedside. Mom usually just got up and made bacon and eggs and hash-browns. Mmm so good!

Sigh, good times being a little kid. I hope when I have children, they're as awesome as I was when I was a child. And I'm going to make sure my kids eat Surprise Toast for breakfast too!

Live Shows

I used to go to a LOT of shows... and I still do go to a fair bit of them, but there are so many things that annoy me when I go to concerts and they are as follows.

The Audience
I like to be on the floor and close to the stage, like many others do, but I don't understand people who insist on being front and centre. What does it matter? People push and shove their way right up the very front of the stage where they got squashed and stepped on and can barely breathe, let alone move!

Girls are especially bad for this. And then they're upset when strangers grope them, and ram them into the gates. I've even seen girls cry because they're stuck in such a horrible position and the OBO has to haul their sorry asses out before they suffocate. I always laugh at those losers.

I also hate people who insist on taking shitty cell phone videos and pictures of the concert. Honestly, your photos looks like shit. NOBODY on the internet cares to look at it because it doesn't look good. You're friends and family seriously don't care either. Plus you look like a fucking retard holding your phone up in the air and it often is in my way of seeing what's happening on stage. I must admit that when I see people doing that, I secretly wish they get shoved and drop their phone and it breaks. (Yes, I shove people who are taking cell phone vids and pics.)

The Performers
I don't care if I paid $5 or $75 to come see you play live, but I certainly did not pay to have you hold your microphone into the crowd and have your fans sing the chorus for you. I really hate that. It's a douchy move to make.

Also, don't tell me to fucking clap along. This isn't nursery school. Every time the lead singer says, "C'mon y'all, get your hands up!" I lose respect.

There is one exception where I will clap along: If the song has clapping in it as part of the percussion and the lead singer wants me to clap along during the part of the song that was recorded with clapping in it, then that is acceptable. So far the ONE and ONLY band that I have ever clapped along with is Tokyo Police Club. They rock.

This next pet peeve is aimed at bands who haven't been together long and haven't played many lives shows. I don't know why, but these fresh bands feel the need to fill the empty space between songs with chatter. It's actually very unnecessary and nobody in the audience gives a fuck what you're saying because it's usually not important, not funny, and not interesting to listen to.

In between songs, you don't have to say a word. Just tune your guitar if you have to, the lead singer should introduce the title of the next song, or mention what album it's off of. Perhaps thank the audience for being an awesome crowd.

A big no-no is when someone in the band says something like: "This next song we're about to play is about living your life to the fullest and not letting people get you down because life rocks and we shouldn't' be afraid to just live our lives the way we want to."

Wow. Thanks your input. I don't care.

Everyone perceives a song differently and in my opinion, music is about striking an emotion. Just like a book or a movie, people want to feel moved by what they see, hear, or read. They want to be scared, they want to cry, they want to laugh, they want to feel encouraged.

So, when you explicitly describe to the tee what the song is about for YOU, you're clouding the emotions that your audience might have in regards to the song and in essence, ruining it for them.

I can't remember the artist, but I recall whoever it was, they had a hit single or whatever and when they made the music video for it, it was like watching a Windows Media Player visualization. It was a bunch of colours swirling and changing shape and stuff.

The reason why the artist did that was because he said he didn't want to distort other people's perception of the song that they had. Because when you listen to a song, you create a picture for that song in your head. When you watch the music video, you've seen someone else's interpretation of the song and that can often alter your perception of the song once you see that.

To me that's pretty respectable.

There's probably many more things that are highly annoying when I go to a show, but these ones I've listed are the main ones!

A Politically Incorrect Shift

My first assignment when I got to work on Saturday was to go to the Odena Circle at The Forks for some sort of spiritual thanksgiving type thing. I don't even know. When I arrived, a white tent was set up, and there was barely 20 people there. Some musical acts were about to start playing.

While they were setting up, one of the guys from Eagle & Hawk, (that super famous Winnipeg aboriginal band that won a shit ton of awards and played with the Winnipeg Symphony Orchestra once at some awards night or something this year) anyway, one of the guys was giving away free CD's. Except to win a CD, you had to participate in his "Indian Bingo" as he called it. Wow.

He would ask if anyone in the audience had BLANK and then whoever rushed up first to prove it won. He called out for nail clippers, someone who was wearing a sock with a hole in it... things like that.

For the very last CD he said, "this one's for the young people! Who here has a hickey?"

People were laughing but nobody was calling bingo. I said, "I have a hickey... but I'm supposed to working."

He asked me to prove it, and I showed him. He called me a liar, saying the mark was made from my camera on my shoulder. I said, "no way! This is a real hickey!"

I won the CD! It's autographed! I like Eagle & Hawk, so that's awesome. He started making fun of me saying he wonders what else I do with my CBC camera when I'm not at work, and blah blah blah. Everyone was laughing and I was blushing!

My next stop was the Nomads Football Field. I couldn't find a damn place to park because there was construction everywhere! I finally just said screw it and parked in the emergency vehicle area. Who's gonna stop me? I work for the news damn it!!!

I had to wait until intermission to speak to a coach and find out the numbers of the players I was told to ISO. I tell the coach I want to do interviews with the two players. Coach says I can't do interviews with the players because they got rides here with other people and they won't want to wait in the cold as well as the other players will be jealous if they don't get to be on camera too. (Wtf? The story isn't about those other players)

That doesn't make sense, but okay. I ask, "when can I do an interview with the head coach. My reporter has some questions for him."

I'm told to go across the field and do the interviews while the game is going on, that way I can the two players and the coach and all will be fine and dandy and nobody goes home upset and cold.

I went across, but then some bitch ref with a huge ass tells me straight I cannot be on this side of the field and kicks me off. I tell her that the coach told me to come over here.

"Well, he's WRONG!"

well OKAY THEN!

I hauled my gear back to where I was before. The game started up. I started trying to ISO the two players. One of them was wrapped up in a blanket on the sidelines for most of the time. Great footage.

That stupid ref comes back around telling me to back away from the sides lines 5 ft. I back up. She tells me to back up more and some other guy stuck up for me and told Bitchy McFat-Ass that I WAS backed up 5 ft from the line. She left me alone for the rest of the game.

At the end of the game, I didn't get any interviews with the two kids I was supposed to. They left and the coaches didn't bother to tell them that I wanted to talk to them.

The coach was going to leave with out giving me an interview too. I cut him off though in the field explaining my reporter really wanted this interview.

(Also, apparently it was the coach who called the sports reporter and BEGGED for a camera to be sent out today so it's really weird that he didn't want to be more accommodating.)

The interview with him went fine. I got some great clips from him... but he said something really odd and I had to stop and think about it again.

He used the phrase "fresh off the boat" to explain how he had two players who were directly from Africa on his team. I really don't think that's politically correct.

I've got 4.5 more hours left of my shift to go... we'll see what else happens tonight.