Meditation

I know just a small handful of people who meditate for real.

I met one guy a new year's party a few years back who could meditate for hours on end. He could only meditate when the house was completely empty and quiet. He'd turn off anything loud, or that made any noise, and he'd sit in whatever position, I don't even know, close his eyes, do his breathing exercise, and clear his mind.

Clearing your mind is one of the most difficult things a person can do. It's damn near impossible, but it can be mastered slowly over time if one wishes to practice on a regular basis.

Meditating is almost like the act of consciously thinking of nothing. The problem is, we are constantly thinking about something, anything, everything. Apparently if you can clear your mind, you will start to de-stress. You can relax. When you are awoken from you meditation you will be able to think more clearly and concisely.

Meditation takes FOREVER! Nobody in our culture really has the time that it takes to properly meditate. In fact, most people who try it wind up getting bored, or tiring of it.

Then man I met at the new years party says anybody can do it though if they just make time for it and not give up.

If you start slowly, like perhaps set aside some time in your day or week and find out which position you feel most comfortable sitting in and do the breathing exercises, you can eventually reap the benefits of meditation. If you can sit still and breathe for 30 min you're off to a good start.

However long it takes you to feel comfortable sitting and breathing for a long period of time, you can then really start clearing your mind. You can think of white space, you can think of your thoughts blowing away, or melting, or of water, or whatever helps you.

Meditating should and will be different from daydreaming, or napping. Your mind and body are still active. When you daydream or nap you have no control over your thoughts. Meditating is complete control over your thoughts. The breathing at the begging helps put you in trance-like state. It relaxes you and prepares you.

Eventually, after doing so many times, it won't take hours to mediate, you will just meditate for hours. You will be able to slip into a meditation very easily because you've trained your body and mind to be able to do it.

You know when you come home from work and all you want to do is just think about nothing and veg on the couch and watch TV? That's almost like a form of mediation. You've trained your body and brain that TV = Relaxation and therefore you feel upset when you can't relax on the couch. All mind numbing activities are the same; video games, internet, and anything you do to shut your brain off. I would say meditating is a good alternative.

Stupid Shapes

Shapes is really starting to piss me off.

A week ago, on Tuesday, I had a workout with Luis. Fine. Good. He says we can't work out Thursday because of the teeth thing, but he'll find me a replacement.

Then I get a call from Luis on Wednesday saying he's doing his teeth early, he won't be there to work out with me, but encouraged me to go by myself. He said he was still looking for someone to replace him Thursday. I didn't go. I did laundry.

Thursday I get a call from Luis saying he couldn't find anybody to replace him for Thursday, so to just go by myself again. I went by myself. It wasn't much fun.

I spend the entire long weekend drunk or shopping in a different country. No working out for me! I ate lots of junk and we only ate at bar and grill restaurants.

Tuesday, (yesterday) I call Shapes to book an appointment with somebody else for Wednesday, Thursday, Friday morning. They don't have anybody who can come in all those days for 9 am. They book me with Damian for 8 am this morning.

I go. He doesn't. He calls in sick at the last minute.

Sigh. Fucking Shapes! Why do you do this to me? Can't you just let me work out with a trainer?

Then some other lady who coordinates it all was telling me I should book all my appointments as far ahead in advance as I can so that I will have a routine schedule. Yeah, that works if I had a job where I work the same hours all the time.

If I'm a 10:30 shooter I have to work out in the mornings at 8:30 am and no later or I'll miss my bus to work.
If I'm a 2:00 shooter, I don't have to wake up so early, and I can work out a little bit later in the morning, maybe even 10:00.
If I'm a 10:30 editor, I have to work out in the mornings at 8:30 am or I'll miss my bus.
If I'm a 12:00 editor, I don't have to wake up so early, and I can work out at like 9:00 in the morning.
If I'm assistant directing, I have to work out 8:00pm because I need to burn off some news show adrenaline.

I guess I could just book everything for 8:30 in the morning, but it is SUCH a hassle to change everything around. I hate booking appointments and then re-booking them, and changing them, and cancelling them.

If I were to book a month's worth of workouts in advance like they want me to, I would be changing them EVERY WEEK!

So fricken annoying.

I worked out by myself today and I didn't like it one bit. I miss Luis. My one true trainer. Please come back to me soon!

Expelled: No Jake Hammell's Allowed!

Jake, don't read this until you've seen the movie.

The rest of you scroll ahead.

Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed

Dave downloaded the documentary and we watched it last night. I feel a strong need to comment after watching it.

First things first, if you know me, you know that I am quite picky when it comes to shooting and editing styles.

It looked as though this doc was shot with one stedicam and one normal camera which was handheld for 95% of the documentary. What this means is that the entire documentary looked like absolute shit! Every interview seemed overly candid with the camera constantly adjusting and the poor framing and poor lighting setups. God, it looked fucking terrible! I understand that was the look they were going for, but it really didn't work for them.

I think it would have been much more compelling had they used more traditional camera and lighting setups for their interviews. I would have been able to focus better on what was being said instead of being distracted by how it looked on screen.

Second thing. Lots of poor audio. Again, I understand this was all part of the master plan. They purposely chose to record the audio in such a way to make everything look a little more real, a little less rehearsed. It was irritating.

Third thing. Their use of lighting was very odd. I distinctly remember one interview where they lit the left side of the interview subject, but placed the cameras on the right side so that the dark side of the face was on camera. The interview subject's nose was casting an odd shadow on his cheek. It wasn't flattering. Most of the lighting setups were not flattering. I thought it was very sneaky how when they interviewed a person that was not favourable to their campaign, it was always dark lighting set ups with lots of shadow value and very sinister looking. The "Good Guy" interviews had a lot more light and were much brighter. It was all very subtle, but I noticed it.

Fourth thing. The final interview with Richard Dawkins was the most enjoyable part of the doc for me. The whole powder puff thing was a little cheesey... "Oh sorry I'm late" with Stein running in. Pfft. Whatever. Fakers. That's probably not even close to what happened.

I liked Ben Stein trying to trick Dawkins with his questions and multiple re-asks. Then, when Dawkins says that he agrees there's the possibility that a different civilization, far more advanced than we are, from somewhere else in the universe, could have possibly seeded the earth, Stein is very triumphant.

If Intelligent Design is defined as "a civilization, far more advanced than we are, from somewhere else in the universe, seeded the earth, thus starting life on earth" then I would agree that we should be teaching and researching more on intelligent design.

BUT, nowhere in the documentary does anybody mention what intelligent design is defined as. People are quick to assume, oh it means God or other religious views, and they talk at great length how it's not. Well, then what is it? What is intelligent design? They failed to report one that one very huge aspect of the movie.

So, as it stands, I am still pro evolution, Pro Darwinism, or Neo Darwinism or whatever it's called. I also like the theory of the earth being seeded by another civilization. If this seeding theory is classified as Intelligent Design, then fine. That's what it's called. Evolutionist people seem to accept this as a theory but aren't calling it Intelligent Design.

I said to David, whether they call this seeding theory intelligent design or not, there's still the question of where did that civilization come from, how and why? Exactly what Richard Dawkins asked Stein. David pointed out to me that the question is not about THEM, but about US and how WE got here on Earth. That's what we're worried about. Once we solve that, then we can worry about other races.

All By Myself

I had to work out all by myself yesterday. Luis is out of commission obviously, with all this teeth business getting out of control. He said he was going to try to find me a replacement trainer, but he couldn't on such short notice.

I'm supposed to call this girl named Jodi who is in charge of setting up trainer's appointments to see about getting a temp trainer for a while.

Working out by yourself sucks by the way!

New Teeth

Luis had to get new teeth. I... don't even know. Honestly. I don't know.

He had loaner teeth when I saw him Tuesday. He called yesterday to cancel our Wednesday workout because of this teeth dilema. He encouraged me to still hit the gym, work on my abs routine and get some more cardio done. I promised I would. I didn't. I meant to though. I had no clean work out clothes. So, instead of working out, I did 4 loads of laundry and read some more of my book, "Keeping Faith" by Jodi Picoult.

It's an odd book. It's about a 7 year old girl who has an imaginary friend called her Guard. This imaginary friend turns out to be God, (or so everything thinks) and she performs miracles, has a stigmata episode (even though she's technically Jewish)... AND even though she's never been to church and does not practice religion or talk about religion with anyone. The little girl is making headlines left right and centre. People come from far and wide to camp out on the edges of her property to catch a glimpse of this special girl... perhaps, maybe even touch her so they can be healed! It's crazy.

There's a lot more going on... I don't really want to get into it right now. Basically, there's a man who thinks it's a hoax and is trying to prove this girl isn't talking to God, but he has a crush on the girl's mother, who recently had a divorse. And the little girl's father thinks this God business has gone too far and now they're in a custody battle.

I really love how all of Jodi Picoult's books' titles' have a double meaning. Like, Keeping Faith for example. Just think about it.

Oh, right, exercising. Because Luis is dealing with his new teeth tonight, he's paired me up with a temp trainer to spot me and stuff. I'm nervous. I've put my trust in Luis and now some random trainer who I don't even know is coming to tell me what to do! I want Luis back. He is my one true trainer. I shall be faithful.

Evening Workouts

This week, starting tonight, I'll be training with Luis in the evenings. My job has stressed me out so much that when I get off work I've got the shakes and it takes forever to calm down. Plus, it's too much of a rush in the mornings. I have to wake up early, work out for an hour, rush home, get ready for work in 15 minutes or less, catch a freaking bus!

Luis made me late for work the last time we worked out. I ran out training sessions. I've decided that I want to work out 3 times a week for 3 more months. That's a lot of money! I'm paying like... I don't even know how much a month to be in shape and look good. Looking good and being healthy costs big bucks! I think I'm paying $100 a month, around there, for my gym membership and my training sessions. I'm nuts, I know.

I'm thinking that I'll train until summer, and by that time, I'll know what to do, and how to do it by myself properly. Then I can save money, as well as doing fun summer activities (with my muscular body) I think I'll walk around topless on the beach or something... you know... show off my biceps, triceps, 8 pack...

Missed Workout

I missed my first workout. I had a stressful day at work yesterday and came home to a stressful household. I stayed up late writing to my inmate friend in Texas. Woke up this morning, late. Felt super shitty and called in to cancel my work out.

I still have to pay for it and I don't get to reschedule.

Tomorrow I have a workout scheduled for 8:30 am. Let's hope I make it.